Monday, October 15, 2007

Adoption Fears

Do we ever worry about the risks that come with an adoption? That our child won't bond well with us, or will have medical or emotional issues that weren't disclosed ahead of time? What if we get a drug baby or have to deal with something like fetal alcohol syndrome or attachment disorder? I recently read that as many as 80% of adoptive mothers experience post-adoption depression (now there's something to look forward to).

Do we ever think about these things? Yes. In fact, sometimes when I look back at how clear God made it to us that He wanted us to do it, I think, "Well, that must be because it's going to be pretty rough and I'll be wondering if we did the right thing or not."

I admit, sometimes I can have a pessimistic attitude about God. Like He's just about to give me a whole bunch of trouble to deal with. Just the other morning I was thinking about how much our lives could be about to change. "Who knows what is around the corner?" I mused. I was thinking of the sleep deprivation a new child brings, the trauma for our whole family if this child has a difficult time adjusting, all kinds of things we could be dealing with that we never imagined. Yep, things could be pretty bad.

As a parent, it must make God sad when his children look at him and say, "I just know you're about to dump a whole bunch of trouble on me." I think about how I would feel if I asked my kids to do something and they did it but acted like they thought I was only going to hurt them.

That same morning, I read from Proverbs 16, "...his favor is like a rain cloud in spring." Here in the desert, a rain cloud is pretty much always cause for excitement. We see it coming in from a distance and we look forward to it because we know it is full of what we need.

As a child of God, do I dread what he's going to do next, or do I open my arms to welcome it in anticipation? How can we not expect a blessing from the God who loves us so much?

Not that we're going to be free of having to deal with any of the issues we worry about. Sometimes it's not a gentle rain that the clouds bring. Sometimes our monsoons blow in with a fury and roofs are damaged, trees are lost. We don't escape unscathed, but neither do we hope it never rains again, because rain ultimately brings life.

I'm reminded of a passage from The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe, when Lucy, upon hearing of Aslan, asks if he is safe. Not unlike me, when I ask God, "Is everything going to work out just right for us?"

Mrs. Beaver's response to Lucy is: "Who said anything about safe? 'Course he isn't safe. But he's good. He's the King, I'll tell you."

1 comment:

Poppa said...

Angie, God has so blessed you with the gift of writing. I am hoping I can tie that in with a communion message.
I love you